Oliver Shellding


166 games reviewed
69.8 average score
75 median score
51.2% of games recommended
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1.5 / 10.0 - Love Kuesuto
Oct 6, 2023

This could have been handled well. Love Kuesuto, though clearly antiquated in concept, could have been given a little bit of a fun tone – play as a woman, have more open ended questions, involve literally any gameplay – but it’s just rough and painful. It takes far too long to play while also taking no time at all. It isn’t fun, it isn’t clever, and it soapboxes so hard to no one about nothing. You could watch an Andrew Tate video fed through a Donald Duck voice filter and get the same amount of humor and good information.

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Burrow of the Fallen Bear: A Gay Furry Visual Novel really stressed the point that people who enjoy this game also enjoy multiple sexual encounters with multiple partners with zero connection other than physical. That all beliefs, ideas and personal codes can be thrown out the window if arousal is observed. If this is just meant to be erotica, put that in the title.

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1.5 / 10.0 - Neko Secret Room
Jun 22, 2022

It’s not sexy enough to justify how bad the gameplay is, there is no story that could possibly explain anything that’s happening on screen (why am I hacking into a computer to look at nude photos of strangers?), and the number of titles out there that deliver more eroticism with less blatant sex pandering are high. Everyone will judge you for playing this, and no one will be your character witness in court afterwards. It’s hot trash, and if you’re seriously into the character design here, there are better games that are actually games. Please, don’t do this to yourself. You deserve better.

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2 / 10.0 - Aquarist
Oct 19, 2022

This is a fully formed digital release on the most profitable console on the planet at this time. It has nothing for no one, and I’m just sad that someone probably will play this in an attempt to make life a bit better. Bad news, mate: this fish is dead in the water.

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If you can parse down the file size significantly, change the interface so you aren’t using a floating mouse cursor, lower the unlock price tags and polish the performance overall, this could be a fun little title regardless of your familiarity with Warmhammer 40,000. As it stands, Dakka Squadron is boring, repetitive, painful and a waste of time, especially if you aren’t out here just to screech a line from a game while others hoot in acknowledgement.

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Feb 4, 2024

When I give a game up as a loss, it’s not because of difficulty. Games are open and often brazen about unfair levels of hardness, and I am inherently terrible at games, but still love them. Something being “hard” is not a reason to bounce off or give it an awful score. When I give up on a game, it’s because it’s either boring or broken, and Saga of the Moon Priestess managed to be both.

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2.5 / 10.0 - Pretty Girls Speed
Jun 13, 2022

You could literally buy a decent deck of cards and just search the internet for “hot anime girls” and end up with the same result, but better. More variety in whatever waifu you want to look at, and you can play other games with the deck of cards. Maybe even play against people. Hell, this could be your gateway into socialization so that you stop wasting time on clickbait games that seek to use your libido against your wallet.

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Apr 23, 2023

That is my feeling, my awful, heavy feeling about Arcana of Paradise ~ The Tower. If I had gotten exceedingly lucky with my first roll of characters, maybe I would have been hooked by the grindloop and joyfully gotten bread for my fellow kids. Instead, I just felt disappointment and disinterest grow like a fungus in my heart. I kept trying to play so I could find more, figure out what it is that makes it tick, and I found nothing. This isn’t worth my time, and I can’t say, with any confidence, that it’s worth yours.

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Nov 11, 2022

The minigame competitive scene is already chock full of great choices, and Garfield Lasagna Party isn’t one of them. It’s somehow both too long and too short at the same time, with minigames and animations running overtime, and gameplay being terse and light.

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4 / 10.0 - Fashion Dreamer
Nov 5, 2023

Fashion Dreamer is an extreme version of Paper Dolls with the added bonus of a never ending parade of additional playmates. If you have the time and the resolve, you have a fascinating, perpetually positive world of fashion, creativity and interactions. In that realm, it has endless possibilities, and that’s going to be great for some. But, if you’re hoping for a reason behind it all – a story, a goal, something besides “because it’s there” – then this is one trend that we simply won’t be joining.

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4.5 / 10.0 - Chemically Bonded
Oct 30, 2023

Getting from point A to B in Chemically Bonded takes only the effort of reading and little else. There’s a few endings but all can be achieved rather easily. It’s a contained universe that doesn’t feel like it merits sequels, but who knows, maybe more might be on the way? The glimpse of Ceri and the art style makes me feel like there’s potential for more from ds-sans, but I hope they swing for the fences next time.

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4.5 / 10.0 - Mr. Prepper
Jun 14, 2022

Mr. Prepper has decent graphics, a fun throughline for a story, and really opens up in terms of actions the further on you go. Yet it’s the needing to do it in such a limited window, both for the auto-save countdown and the lack of mouse, that keep it from being something that I’d come back to time and again. I might consider picking it up on the computer in the future, but I don’t think anyone should be playing it on the Switch. It’s just not what the burgeoning prepper deserves.

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Feb 26, 2024

Geometry Survivor is a rather simple title that could go one of two ways. Either it stays the way it is and just fades into obscurity, or it continues to build and becomes something great. The potential is there: the groundwork has been laid and the concept is solid. But there needs to be more in terms of every direction, from more areas to more weapons and more excitement. Make some fake achievements, create a daily scoreboard, add a massive time speedup, just do SOMETHING so this isn’t as small and shallow as a cloudburst puddle.

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Feb 19, 2024

If, like me, you have a curiosity and fondness for games from back in the day, then Cosmic Fantasy Collection is something that merits a bit more investigation, but I sadly can’t recommend it strongly. Besides the manual and the sound/movie viewers, the QOL improvements that other straight JRPG ports have received are nonexistent, and, without the ability to speed up encounters or exploration, the time takes its toll on your patience. Physical collectors would do well to grab their copies quickly, and, should the second Cosmic Fantasy Collection come calling, it definitely has my interest: it can only get better from here.

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A Boy and his Blob Retro Collection strikes me as on the same level as a parking lot carnival. When you’re young, it’s exciting and fun because your parents aren’t taking you anywhere else and there’s sugar involved. When you get older, you see the seams and the shortcomings and honestly wonder if it’s worth your time. The answer lies in how important nostalgia is for your gaming excitement.

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May 26, 2023

Maybe when I just want to have a pulpy storyline with a bunch of turn based combat, I pick up a short RPG and blast away at mutated animals and doomsday cultists and call it a day. Perhaps, when I’m hungry for it, For A Vast Future is just the snack I need. Sadly, today, I was looking for something a bit more filling, and this left me just a bit dissatisfied.

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If this is your jam and you have been waiting, you’re a truly fascinating individual and I’m glad you can get this title for less than a movie ticket. Enjoy it, unlock all the hidden achievements, have fun because it’s a cute and simple game. For everyone else… I don’t know what to tell you. I’m at the point where I don’t know how I got here and I need to call an adult. The sheep made me do it.

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5 / 10.0 - Subway Midnight
Mar 15, 2023

It wasn’t always clear what should be done, it wasn’t always easy, but it did always manage to be unerringly true to itself. Like skydiving or another extreme activity, I would cautiously tell the right people to give it a try and find so much that, honestly, is like nothing else. Are you the right people? You may just need to buy a train ticket and find out.

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5 / 10.0 - Smurfs Kart
Nov 14, 2022

This game has no future for my own interests. I can nod and say “I played it,” followed by shrugging if asked if I liked it. If my friend wanted to try it, I’d give it another spin with them, but it’s far, far down the list for a game I’d recommend to pick up and play.

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5 / 10.0 - Nitro Kid
Oct 17, 2022

Nitro Kid has potential, but there’s a key factor missing that keeps it from just popping on the screen. The Codex is hilarious and I want to read more, the boss variety is interesting and the concept isn’t bad at all: I like the animation from rescuing the Nitro Kids and from certain enemy attacks. But the repetition and the need to basically luck into a strong route build keep it from being something I want to come back and play again. In a gaming ecosphere that is currently flooded with roguelite deckbuilders, Nitro Kid is barely able to tread water.

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