I’m just here to tell you that The Procession to Calvary is the strongest. Four Last Things is in between. Death of the Reprobate is the weakest. Not by a measurable amount. In fact, based on this site’s rating system, all the games are getting the exact same rating, that’s how consistent they are in quality. But I’m a millennial. I was raised with the internet, and on the internet, we like ranked comparisons, so there it is.
I think that, perhaps, roguelite isn’t a great genre for Swery and Suda to be collaborating on. I get the feeling that the genre was just a means to get an idea that they put together across. That might be okay if the roguelite was at least enjoyable or benign, but it’s really unpleasant to play. The slow, gluey controls, repetitive enemies and environments, and overall clunkiness turn it into a really abrasive experience. On one hand, I hope this isn’t the last we see of Justine and Dr. Carnival. On the other, I kind of just want to forget this ever happened.
While there isn’t anything wrong with Easy Delivery Co., what I find irksome is that it’s clearly made with a love of something I find so appealing, and while it delivers in some aspect, it’s breathing on the neck of greatness. It has all the mechanics down – it feels great to drive the Kei Truck through the snow – but when it comes to conveyance, it lacks a punch. One might say, it doesn’t quite nail the delivery. Oh, wait, I made that joke already.
Yet, having completed the game, I can’t say I feel anything very strong about it. Certainly, I appreciate that it’s about robots surrounded by literal garbage who still find positivity in life. The art style and music is fab. But I don’t feel calmed, I don’t feel entertained, I don’t feel inspired. It’s clear that a lot of love went into it, and it kind of sucks to look at that and a bunch of bright-eyed robots and shrug. But, that’s what I have to do. It’s a positive shrug, though. It does a lot of cool stuff. So, if you were to play it, it would still be a net positive.
However, I love the character of Francis Morgan, and, as such, I love a lot of the insight into him that Deadly Premonition 2 gives (even though some of it isn’t particularly well-executed). He’s the most convincing reason to play this game at all, and it’s really great as a character exploration. That got me through to the end credits. And it could maybe get me through it again if I feel like reconnecting at some point. But the game itself is a bland, joyless slog. It’s almost unreal. And not in a good way.
And I think that sums up The Drifter nicely. “Effective” is the best word I can find to describe it. Everything it does, it does with style and confidence. Even the few missteps it makes just melt into the overall picture. Just a sterling poink adventure all around. Straight gilded. I’m not sure if or when I’m ever going to play it again, but damn, I’m impressed.
Nonetheless, at least Irem Collection Volume 3 is a compilation of three good arcade titles. Okay, maybe I didn’t really jive with Mr. Heli, but I don’t think it’s a bad game… probably. I just don’t think the price tag is representative of the package. If I had to guess, it’s because they want to keep parity with the physical release. But when you’re looking at it on a digital storefront between Taito Milestones and Capcom Arcade Stadium, it doesn’t look very tantalizing, regardless of how much you like Mr. Heli.
The Procession to Calvary is nothing groundbreaking, but it’s an extremely solid follow-up to the already great Four Last Things. I’m looking forward to grabbing Death of the Reprobate and capping off the series when I can afford it. Which isn’t right now, but hopefully soon. If you haven’t tried the games, however, you’ve got some catching up to do.
And that’s it. At an hour-and-a-half (in my sinful experience), Four Last Things hits hard and dances off over the horizon. It pokes fun at dead artists, the Catholic Church, and God. Plus, you get to sin, which is always a pleasure. It’s a great way to pass the time until your final judgment. Amen.
It’s a game that is interesting just in the fact it exists. I think it’s neat. You probably already know if you think it’s neat. However, it’s hard to give it a recommendation beyond that, since it’s so insubstantial. At the same time, it isn’t straight-up bad. It functions, it just doesn’t strive to do anything beyond that. If you’re curious, you can always buy the digital version of the game, rather than shelling out for the cartridge.
Clock Tower is one of those games where I’m not sure I really liked it much, but I’m glad I played it. I’m not even talking from a historical perspective. Yeah, it’s an important game, but it’s also a very unique one. An SNES game with such a dark presentation and such heavy atmosphere isn’t all that common, and Clock Tower does an impressive job of it. I just wish it was less of a chore to play.
A lot of the issues I outlined and other big stoppages I ran into could be ironed out with time focused to careful playtesting. I think that another couple of months, and Fruitbus would have been closer to where it needs to be. But barring a last-minute stomp on the brakes, this is how it’s launching. I really, really wanted to love Fruitbus, but I can only review how it was served to me.
It’s a loving tribute to Atari’s early console and the games that defined it, and it provides a nostalgic vision of yesteryear’s gaming laced with a bit of horror. The final act might be a bit too much torment, but it doesn’t crack the polish of the game’s bulk. It’s absolutely worth it, just maybe chamber a few swears in preparation.
I’m not sure that Grunn is going to remain cemented in my mind the same way Bernband is. The goals here are a lot more modest and less bold. On the other hand, it is an enjoyable experience. No matter how many times I woke up in that seat on the bus, I was always ready to take on the game again. Gradually unraveling its mysteries while keeping the hedges trimmed kept me engaged. Without thinking too hard about it, Grunn is probably the most relaxing horror game I’ve ever played.
This might be Nightdive’s most important remaster. While the developer has helped polish up already popular games like Quake and System Shock, Killing Time benefits far more from their tender touch. It was already great, but this remaster makes it easier to digest. It really brings out its highlights, allowing the whole thing to shine a lot brighter. If you have never explored Matinicus Island, Killing Time: Resurrected is easily the best way to do so, and it’s high time you did.
Retrorealms Arcade just feels so unspectacular. Competent, sure. It’s not a bad time. It’s just not a particularly memorable one, even if you’re a fan of the movies within. It feels like WayForward made sidescrollers and put the characters in them rather than having the games informed by the characters. So, if you wanted to play a platformer like Michael Myers, then that’s what you get and very little more. There isn’t much meat to sink a knife into.
Solid and definitely has an audience. There could be some hard-to-ignore faults, but the experience is fun.
If you do have a reliable group – preferably one who you already play Mario Party games with – then Mario Party Jamboree is probably going to be your new go-to. In many of the recent entries, I feel a lot was phoned in. Not enough would be changed, but some aspects would feel weaker or even unwelcome. However, while Jamboree mainly just builds off the original framework, it’s a lot tighter and more rounded than we’ve seen since the N64 days. I’ll admit it can be hard to get excited about yet another Mario Party, but this one is absolutely worth attending.
Some restraint when it came to the length of the remake would have done wonders. But aside from the needless bloat and technical problems, there’s still a lot to like. Remaking Silent Hill 2 could have gone horribly wrong, and maybe this modernization won’t replace the original for some, but it’s at least a worthwhile new perspective.
It’s the house that was built for the actual racing that is the problem. Beneath the vibrant colors and retro sensibilities, it’s disappointingly unpolished and monotone. Getting through the championship took me short of 6 hours, but it feels like it would be better off being half that with better attention to detail. As it stands, Victory Heat Rally isn’t the bumpiest ride I’ve been on, but it would benefit from a tune-up.