John Cal McCormick Avatar Image

John Cal McCormick

Durham, UK

Favorite Games:
  • Final Fantasy IX
  • Persona 4 Golden
  • Mass Effect 2

72 games reviewed
63.3 average score
60 median score
38.9% of games recommended

John Cal McCormick's Reviews

There's a good chance that while you're reading this, John is in his pyjamas with a PS4 controller in his hands. He loves music and movies from the '80s, considers cheese to be the most important major food-group, and has no regrets about the amount of time he's spent chasing platinum trophies.
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Mar 30, 2021

Ultimately, how much you enjoy I Saw Black Clouds is going to hinge on your appreciation level for schlocky horror and low-budget psychological thrillers. It's an amusing enough diversion, but the story may leave you unsatisfied depending on your route through the game, and there's nothing here that you haven't already seen in a dozen straight to DVD clangers starring Stephen Baldwin or Tara Reid.

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4 / 10 - Taxi Chaos
Mar 1, 2021

If all you want is a facsimile of Crazy Taxi that you can play without dusting off your old Dreamcast then Taxi Chaos just about fits the bill. But that's all it does. For anybody coming into this without the benefits of nostalgia or more money than sense, Taxi Chaos is just a dull arcade driver with precious little to offer other than the dubious pleasure of chasing a high score. Send this one to scrap yard.

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3 / 10 - Empire of Sin
Dec 7, 2020

Oh dear. Empire of Sin has a fantastic idea at its core, and the jolly soundtrack perfectly complements the over the top character designs. But the game is a technical mess, littered with a spectacular array of bugs, and crippled by poor design choices that derail whatever little momentum the game may otherwise have had. Empire of Sin? They should have called it Buggy Malone.

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Nov 24, 2020

Katamari Damacy Reroll is a faithful if unadventurous remake of a PlayStation 2 classic that should probably be experienced by every gamer at least once. The unique presentation and anarchic sense of humour stand the test of time, and the satisfying gameplay loop makes high score chasing a treat. It's a game in which you can roll over old women with a massive sticky ball and honestly you just can't say that about most games.

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5 / 10 - Five Dates
Nov 17, 2020

We played it three times over a couple of bottles of wine, cringing together, laughing at the awkward conversations, and rolling our eyes in unison when one girl announced she was "an influencer". So if you've got a big bottle of claret and someone to play this with we'd recommend it. If you're on your own and after a romantic comedy, we'd probably go for The Wedding Singer.

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Oct 29, 2020

Each chapter of Stories Untold is framed like an episode of a Twilight Zone-style anthology television show, replete with a killer John Carpenter-esque synth-backed intro. It pays more than a passing nod to the introduction to hit show Stranger Things, but it's undeniably cool, and we'd love to see an Untold Stories 2 that continued the theme, only with a more consistent episode quality.

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6 / 10 - Cloudpunk
Oct 19, 2020

Gameplay-wise, as an employee of Cloudpunk you're expected to deliver packages around Nivalis, sometimes within a time limit. You'll do this by piloting your HOVA — a flying car that you can customise — around the city, keeping an eye on both how much gas you've got left and whether your vehicle needs any repairs. It's simple and straight-forward, and it amuses just enough to keep Cloudpunk from dragging during it's nigh 10-hour running time.

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5 / 10 - Port Royale 4
Sep 25, 2020

Port Royale 4's gameplay consists almost entirely of all of the bits in other strategy games that you'd normally set to "Automate" because they're fiddly and boring. It's a game set in the era of pirates with nary a hint of swashing nor buckling.

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Sep 21, 2020

WWE 2K Battlegrounds is a game that seems like it exists purely to house its storefront, offering predatory microtransactions which would be overly pricy in a free-to-play game. In a paid title - even a budget one - they're offensive. The only silver lining here is that the game is rubbish anyway, so feel free to skip it without feeling like you're missing out.

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Captain Tsubasa: Rise of New Champions is a bit like when you fancy watching a game of footy but there's only the Scottish league on the telly. Sure, it looks like football to the untrained eye, and yes, occasionally it's entertaining just like real football, but you're mainly there hoping that someone is going to get chinned.

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