For an Adult Swim game, I didn’t expect much. That’s still true. There isn’t much to this game, except for what there is. If that makes any sense? Rain World is an excellent piece of art; however, it leaves the story very ambiguous as far as I can tell, but the 2D side scrolling stealth platformer is not a game you want to miss.
With all the blustery fury of a two-year-old, many Americans vowed to leave the country if their candidate didn't win. While some of us burst into song after the votes were tallied, others began preparing for the apocalypse. Even if this season does feel a bit different and more sinister, us Yanks must admit it was always thus. If you are packing your things and currently have plans to leave the country, this article is for you. I'd highly recommend a quick stop in England before you go, to maybe cool you head a bit with some solid detective gameplay in Sherlock Holmes: The Devil's Daughter. It worked for me.
Welcome to the future. You are a mech contractor, solving problems for the great leader in your highly customizable mech warrior. The future sounds pretty exciting, right? Did I mention that your mech is controlled like the original Resident Evil, but top-down?
If you've been following my last few reviews, you know that I've had a run of games I wasn't crazy about. I had to actively avoid the urge to rate a game highly, even if it didn't deserve it - to prove to the universe I'm not just some sour bastard devouring free games and pooping out bad reviews. That said, I'm pretty happy with Zombie Night Terror. It has pretty much everything you want in a $13 Lemmings type game. The controls are easy to figure out without a manual, great pixel animation (especially when the zombies get shot), ever increasing complexity and growing toolsets, and as of this writing, bug free fun.
So here I am, trying to protect the city by allocating my force to adequately address issues that arise, when a green icon appears on the screen. I click on it, like I would any other case, and it is a night club looking for help in controlling a line outside, due to a missing bouncer. Without giving it much thought, I send a capable officer over to support the community’s need. At the end of his shift, he quits - citing that the club pays more than the police, and the club owner slides me $4700 for the “favor”. Just like that, I’m a corrupt cop with a hole in my roster. Apparently, I need to pay more attention, or I’ll be in the pokey myself.
Now, this is a game that I can totally get behind. [email protected] is a bad ass, top down, roguelike, dungeon crawling experience all designed in ASCII. For those of you who don’t know what ASCII is, I’ll drop some knowledge on you courtesy of Google. ASCII - (American Standard Code for Information Interchange) is the most common format for text files in computers and on the Internet. In an ASCII file, each alphabetic, numeric, or special character is represented with a 7-bit binary number (a string of seven 0s or 1s). 128 possible characters are defined.
Frankly, aside from a few infinite loop rooms that are not quite as bad as oral surgery but close enough, there's nothing fascinating about this "I can't reach it" simulator. The big chairs look really neat, but that fades pretty quickly into the realization that you have to watch the bastard you just were in the first game, but you can't really do much about it. Also, playing a toddler doesn't really hold a candle to playing a brilliant artist trying to piece together his spiral into alcohol fueled madness. You just mud wrestled the smoking hot girl from accounting, and now she wants to play a game called "couples therapy". There was promise, but it quickly fizzled into a less magical ride around the set of a movie you once loved.
Welcome to The Final Station; a game built upon an interesting take on the apocalypse, and it all happens on a train that you must maintain to keep operational. It’s not an entirely complicated game as far as the gameplay mechanics go, but the story is what’s important here, but it doesn't necessarily leave the best taste in your mouth.
Warning... the following is entirely the opinion of the author, and in no way reflects the opinion of agononline.com, or its affiliates. It has taken me a while to write anything lately. To my four fans, including my mother, I want to apologize. I've been wallowing in the mire of this US presidential election. It has eaten my core, like a fat, secretly racist caterpillar, until I just want to drink and pray for death. In the last debate, one candidate had no idea that Russia detonated its first nuclear weapon in 1949, describing them as being new to nuclear technology. My inner nerd cried. This is one of our options.
A couple of things, gentle readers. First, I’m going to redefine how I do video games reviews. You’ll notice above that, if you aren’t particularly read-y, I have a quick reference as to whether I’d buy the game at its current price. That’s my two cents, based entirely on the fact that I’m an unabashed asshat, and that I’ve probably played a ton of games that came out of the same mold. If I give you a yes, there’s a pretty good chance you’re going to have fun with the game. I’m picky.
This game is like castle crashers, without all the fun. Shooting arrows at rows and rows of enemies may be fun on the subway on the way to work, but when you are playing it on a console, you start playing better games in your head, wishing the "experience" would just end. I'm guessing that this game started out on a cell phone, and was ported for the home systems. Personally, I think the home systems could have lived without them. It is repetitive, boring, and just making myself write this article took a week. The fact that they are paying me in free games like this made me want to quit showing up for work. As always, feel free to reply to this in the comments. I could be wrong, and maybe metroid is buried somewhere in the last stage. The art was nice, and reminded me of games I liked to play. Also of note, if you follow my "work", you'll remember that I sincerely hate this style of game in general, because I'm a poorly made person. Everyone else seems to like this pabulum garbage, and for that, I weep for humanity. We can do better, in my humble opinion.
Are you ready to go be the chosen one again? Me neither. I'm kinda weary of always having to go save the princess, then finding out she's really in another castle. There's a bit of Aladdin in this as well, as the protagonist just happens to be a street rat who hasn't eaten in two days. But! All tired cliches asid, this RTS is enough like Diablo (to the extent that they even swiped the treasure gnome) to keep you digging through the dungeons for better gear.
Welcome to heaven. Or hell. Or both, in the new 'Merica. You can bathe in the blood of the poor, or cry for them, or simply hope the numb you are feeling is natural, and not just an escape from the leering doomnado outside your door. Me, I played Darksiders: Warmastered Edition. It seemed fitting. Sure, I'm intensely biased, as I thoroughly enjoyed the first game. Everything you expect is still here - conflicted War, stunningly stylized characters to both maim and befriend, the evil spirit jackass watching your every move, and the creepy dude who sells you things and occasionally pushes the plot. It is just as good as before, frankly. I didn't see any real flaws of note, although the new textures did seem to be stretched a bit tightly over the old models... but maybe it's just me. I'm sure, if this is your first visit to the wastelands of the new American Hellscape, you'll be just as thrilled as I was the first time I experienced this robust story, even if the similarity of the power grabs gives you a bit of a nervous tic as reality continues to unfold in tattered ribbons.