It’s not just the moths that bug Remothered Broken Porcelain. It’s the fundamentally broken narrative structure, nonsensical cut-scenes, unimaginative gameplay, and tired, badly implemented mechanics. Then there’s the masses of crippling bugs. There’s no amount of patching that will fix this game.
WarriOrb is a painful experience, and your enjoyment levels will depend on how masochistic you are. I found no impetus, no driving force to get the wisecracking Orb from A to B through any more sorry-looking levels. Very quickly I had had enough of retrying broken platforming sections two or three dozen times, for what is essentially no reward, except more of the same relentless, slow, monotonic boredom.
A sugar glider nature documentary as a video game, AWAY The Survival Series is an interesting idea for an hour. At that point its otherwise buoyant glide is dragged down by erratic camera, game-breaking glitches, poorly implemented combat and awful gliding controls. This one is better left in the wild.
With fights that boil down to a pointless tussle with both crabs ending up face to face with the weapons and claws almost completely unable to fit, or get any purchase, I can’t recommend Fight Club on its combat. It has no story whatsoever, lots of painful menus and the craziest floatiest physics controls. But it’s certainly a spectacle.
This is a simple game with a simple mission with only the bare minimum of content to keep you playing. Usually, even the simplest games are at least polished in one particular way or another with either beautiful graphics, or some interesting gameplay gimmick to keep you coming back. Galactic Warfighter has no unique selling point. It is as generic as its name suggests.
Pathologic 2 is an experience, I’ll give it that. But not one I wish to spend any further time in. It’s just far too dull and painful. The most telling thing of all? I fell asleep playing. Pathologic 2 is out now for most systems, and just this month on PS4. If you are absolutely desperate for some contagion related entertainment, you can do a lot better than this.
A charming, if simple, Zelda-like full of pot throwing and weirdness, Lila’s Sky Ark will fill a few hours, but fails to really differentiate itself in a crowded modern market.
An ancient Chinese character tale rather than an epic, Xuan Yuan 7 is a linear RPG that takes inspiration liberally from the best games around, but has no idea how to implement anything it’s stolen. Combat is farcically easy, systems are barely explained, puzzles feel decades out of date and there’s that stamina bar that does nothing. Sometimes there’s a reason you haven’t heard of a series.
Clid the Snail is a passable twin-stick shooter with plenty of basic plot to keep you on your slimy path. But it is very rough round the edges. Simplistic combat, dated level design and a grimdark colour palette make it a little hard to see, let alone care what’s going on.
A 2D slash-em-up that’s as instantly forgettable as a ninja flashing past in the night, Within the Blade succeeds at fast-paced kills and decent bosses, but fails to design for stealth or differentiate itself in a genre full of superior experiences.
Beautiful Desolation may have some gorgeous pre-rendered backgrounds, but its impenetrable plot, two-dimensional characters, maddening indirect quests, and cryptic puzzles make it very hard to recommend to anyone but diehard fans of obtuse point-and-click adventures.
With its anime-trope-filled story, and starkly unbalanced combat and upgrades, Metal Unit is a passable roguelite in a genre where there are far better options.
Redout Space Assault feels like two games; an enjoyable arcade shooter on rails, and a free-movement space-sim with no exploration. Glitches, unbalanced difficulty, and a lack of any worthwhile story weigh down what could have been much better.
Gods Will Fall should have been so much more fun. An average action-adventure with a few roguelike elements, it’s combat is both fiddly and too simplistic to engage. Its Gods fail to inspire, and its world lacks tangible reward, while hurting the player with its high-stakes warrior loss mechanic.
For a game about spirits, Sense: A Cyberpunk Ghost Story is pretty soulless. A by-the-numbers backtracking horror game in the vein of Clock Tower, it’s structure and content feel lacklustre and a little disappointing if you went in expecting cyberpunk themes.
The game adaptation of Orwell’s Animal Farm tells a disjointed story, without the kind of buildup and nuance that makes it a classic novel. As a game, it lacks the kind of options and menus necessary to make you feel like you’re ever in control of your farm.
With a muddled story that leaves much unanswered, and a series of half-baked mechanics that feel a decade out of date, it’s hard to recommend Amnesia Rebirth as a way to satisfy your scares this Halloween. You’ll more than likely want to forget all about it.
Average in every respect, and with little to reward or keep you playing, Immortal Realms Vampire Wars is a dull strategy sim, concealed behind an acceptable veneer. When the night is over and sunlight reveals its true form, it’s your will to play that’ll have dried to a husk.
Ary and the Secret of Seasons is a basic my-first-adventure, that rarely lifts itself above mediocrity. Turns out having the power of seasons can’t stop the game being a disappointing rainy day in summer when you’d planned to go to the beach.
Ageless is a passable but uninspired platformer, that copies aspects from the best, only forgetting to copy the polished and fun gameplay. That is a tale as old as time.