Darren Nakamura
There isn't a lot to like here. Banal gameplay, cheap deaths, poor feedback, dull quick-time event combat, bad acting, worse writing, and an overall amateurish presentation. The most enjoyable part of this experience was venting to a colleague about how bad it is.
Still, when I think about I am Bread as a whole, I'm reluctant to say it's good. It's a silly idea and it seems like developer Bossa Studios had a lot of fun building all of the different modes, but I wish I were having that much fun playing it.
It's problem isn't even that it's poorly made, or that it's built on a faulty premise. Indeed, I feel bad to be ambivalent about this game, because it sounded cool on paper. It just misses the balance, leaning too heavily on the side of frustration, with too little to show for all the hard work a player could put in. Really, when I realized playing it was work and I felt relieved to end a session, that's when I knew I ought to just stop playing for good.
This episode could very well be considered the finale for the first season. It wraps up the Wither Storm saga, it answers the questions about the Order of the Stone, and it delivers a semi-happy, hopeful ending for the crew. If only it did that without an utterly boring first half and the clumsy insertion of mandatory Telltale story elements, it might have also been a good ending.
The multiplayer is fine if you can find people to play with, but it doesn't save the experience. If this shipped without a campaign, it might have benefited from it, but as it is now, even the good part will probably be forgotten soon enough.
In the end, it is difficult to recommend Monochroma. Despite its impressive audiovisual presentation, it fails in the areas that make a game a game. It is beautiful in its own dismal way, and the story it tells is decent, but I could not wait for it to end so I would not have to deal with the frustrating control and dull design decisions.
I was prepared to give Color Guardians a solid "meh" at first. Its central concept is GOOD and it shines when it lets itself do that without any room for button mashing, but that only happens during the last third of it. Building up to that is a fairly dull experience, not without challenge but certainly without excitement. If it had ended just before the final boss, it would be a forgettable runner that underdelivers on a good idea. After that terrible fight, I actively disliked it. Play this if you like a challenge and have patience to get to the good stuff, but don't even bother finishing it.
No, Tiny Metal is no substitute for Advance Wars. It does a lot of cool things, and it absolutely satisfies the same craving. But as much as I loved it at times, I hated it at others. It allows for pure turn-based strategy bliss, but there's a lot of garbage to sift through in order to get to it.
But this isn't the mainstream must-play like Harmonix has had in its history. Heck, it isn't even a must-play for people who like quirky little rhythm games, because others have done it better in the past.
There are a few brief moments in Zenge that shine, but most of the time it's just a passable puzzler.
In the end, the game mirrors its own volcano picnic scene. It's cute, it's weird, it sounds like a fun idea at first, and there are some delicious pies to find here and there, but somebody is going to get burned.
There is some hope for the future of the series, as Assembly Required has planted some interesting seeds of what's to come, but it's not quite there yet.
The plot is banal, the writing is tone deaf, and the acting is wooden. Those who can ignore the dressing and focus on the puzzles alone can find some good head-scratching moments and interesting logical interactions. Taken as a whole, Attractio is bipolar; its highs are high and its lows are low. Averaging that out makes it mediocre.
There is some hope for this series to be great in the future, but The Order of the Stone is just okay. The Minecraft-specific gameplay is a nice way to shake up the usual formula. The blank slate of the universe allows the tale to go wherever it wants. The voice cast is full of actors who can do great work. But the writing needs to be more engaging if Story Mode wants to be taken seriously among Telltale canon.
Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Tipping Stars is not bad. It is essentially Mini-Land Mayhem! with visual and technical upgrades. It never instills any sense of wonder or accomplishment, and it often feels more like work than play. It's a very paint-by-numbers affair; for a puzzle game it doesn't actually require much thinking, only doing. It is a game that exists, and that's about as much as there is to say about it.
Still, Sneaky Sneaky is not a bad game. At five bucks for about two hours of gameplay, I could even recommend it to fans of stealth and/or puzzles. But it is by no means a must-play, even for fans of those genres.
Though it is not bad, it is neither great. The basic gameplay concept is fine, and it works as a way to pass time in short bursts. It seems like it could work better if it were a pure skill game rather than the hybrid it is, and it surely would work better on mobile or handheld. The sheer volume of content available for the relatively low price is commendable, but while there is a lot to play in Squids Odyssey, there is not a lot to really love.
All in all, Sleep Tight is a neat little package. It knows what it wants to do and it does most of it well enough, but it might not excite people who don't share the same nostalgia for the specific childhood experience described within it.
The strength of Kingdom is in its trial-and-error learning.
Like the main character, I'm of two minds about it. Thinking back on it there were pieces I really enjoyed. But it was also the kind of game I couldn't play for more than a half hour at a time. Even when I was enjoying it, I could feel it overstaying its welcome. It's decent in short bursts, but marathoning it would just expose its warts even further.