Hey Poor Player
HomepageHey Poor Player's Reviews
Even in the event you’re the sort of chap with a perverse desire to jerk your gherkin in front of random strangers, you’d be underwhelmed by reactions of the game’s dead-eyed denizens. After maybe an initial grunt of amusement at the absurdity of it, the novelty soon wears thin, and the frantic friction sounds of hand upon invisible shaft become the repetitive funeral dirge of a pretty dull experience.
If you are looking for a semi-open world RPG that doesn’t hold your hand, plays like a very old school title, and will shock you with how revolting it tries to be, you might actually like The Pale City. If you’re an avid bookworm who mostly enjoys a story aid over a fully-fleshed out game, I can see this being right up your alley — as long as you enjoy the macabre. For anyone else expecting Baldur’s Gate or the like, consider watching a let’s play before making the purchase, and that advice goes double if you have a short attention span.
By this point, it’s fair to say that I’ve talked, ad nauseam, about Persona 5 Royal. But for those of you wanting a TL;DR, here it is: Persona 5 Royal is an absolutely, positively fantastic experience, and anyone who considers themselves to be a fan of the series would be doing themselves a disservice if they didn’t pick it up. I may not know what lies in the future for the Phantom Thieves, but if this game’s any indicator, things are looking very good.
Despite its camera quirks and a few random crashes to the PlayStation 4 home screen, I enjoyed my time with Darksiders: Genesis. And if you’re a fan of the series who’s looking for a fresh take on the franchise, I think you will too. Developer Airship Syndicate has done a commendable job of transplanting the Darksiders universe to the hack-and-slash genre. With some genuinely solid puzzles and platforming segments to complement the game’s weighty and fun combat, it’s a game that’s worth experiencing alone, and even better with a friend.
Effie‘s mixture of fairytale storytelling and fun platforming work to make an endearing and playable little gem of a game. It’s by no means groundbreaking, but there’s a ton of love put into it and it displays excellent design, even though the combat could use a bit more refinement.
If you have an interest in learning kana and are truly committed to doing so, Kana Quest will certainly aid you in your studies in a fun, memorable way.
I very much enjoyed my time spent with Zombie Army 4: Dead War. As a bit of a horror buff, the game’s goofy, self-aware narrative was a joy to blast my way through. And when it comes to online multiplayer, its cooperative carnage is easy to pick up, and nearly impossible to put down thanks to its addicting scoring system, excellent stage design, and a fun, customizable Horde mode. Still, if you’ve had your fill co-op of zombie shooter like Left 4 Dead, World War Z, and Black Ops 4: Zombies, I’m not sure the game will do enough to rekindle your love for the genre.
Even though I have to admit that I’m not crazy about some of the changes implemented by Chara-Ani, these complaints are almost entirely cosmetic. When all is said and done, these decisions don’t do anything to take away from what remains an exceptional pair of SRPGs. And when it comes to content, there’s no denying Langrisser I & II delivers lots of bang for your gaming buck. It’ll take you roughly 40 hours to play through both of the games featured in this collection. Additionally, with Langrisser II’s branching story and a New Game+ Mode that unlocks after completing each game’s campaign, there’s plenty of reason to come back for more after the credits roll.
Murder By Numbers is definitely your game if you love picross and Phoenix Wright — heavy emphasis on that order. With a seemingly unending amount of picross puzzles at your disposal and plenty of murders to solve, Murder By Numbers accomplishes everything it sets out to do (and then some).
If you’re looking for a space survival FPS that’s new and gorgeous without needing a huge time investment, Antares is definitely something to check out; for anyone else, consider watching some playthroughs before investigating this spooky space station.
If you’re a Kunio-kun or Double Dragon fan, or both, then this is the bundle you’ve been waiting so long for. This is the game that I personally would take with me if I were going to be stranded on a deserted island. Everything about this bundle is perfect. So dust off those knuckles and prepare your Dragon Feet, because Kunio-kun is now officially stateside!
Whether you’ve lived in Selphia for a long time, or have yet to make the journey, Rune Factory 4 Special is absolutely worth picking up.
It’s not often that a decades-old game ages as well as we remember through our rose-colored glasses; fans of the original Sonic the Hedgehog 2 would then feel pleased to hear that SEGA AGES Sonic The Hedgehog 2 gives players the best of what they remembered and then some. With the quality of life improvements and the surprise additions of Super Sonic and Knuckles, among other features, SEGA AGES Sonic The Hedgehog 2 was handled with the love and care such a treasured gem deserves.
. For anyone who enjoys over-the-top beat ‘em ups and/or immersing oneself in the richness of Japanese culture, getting into the Yakuza series is an absolute must. For the price of one game, Yakuza Remastered Collection offers you triple the hostess romancing, arcade machine playing, face kicking fun.
Puyo Puyo 2 fans rejoice. The game you’ve been waiting 25 years for is finally (officially) here. Even though the full package is not 100% localized for the English language, it’s still easy to jump into and enjoy. The rewind feature is a welcome addition and will help newcomers get acclimated with the flow of the game. Just be sure to get tons of practice before going head-to-head in an online match. Trust us.
Ciel Fledge: A Daughter Raising Simulator is one of the best indie games that I’ve played in quite some time, and was some of the most fun that I’ve had with a simulator like this since I played Long Live the Queen. Sure, it’s not perfect. It’s probably a little too long for its own good, and I could see people getting tired of its repetitiveness if they don’t know what they’re in for. But all of those things are fairly trivial; they don’t really matter in the long run because they’re so small. What does matter is that this game is fun. Plain and simple. If you’re in the mood for a quality simulator, then you need not look further than this one.
Death and Taxes has so much more going for it than I’ve even been able to discuss. The art style is fantastic, the voice acting is perfection, the music is brilliant, and the mechanic is sure to delight any Papers, Please fans. But what really, really stuck with me was not only how it dove deeply into existentialism in an entertaining way that didn’t get mired in the macabre, but how it quietly — so subtle, you could miss it — elevated the feel right back up at the end, aligning morals back to a human scale and setting the expectation and desire to do better.
Overall, Azur Lane: Crosswave is a good game chock-full of fan service. If you’re a fan of the mobile game you’ll have plenty to like here. Many of the systems in the game function the same as they do on mobile so it is very easy to play, looks nice, and sounds nice too. Though the story segments can seem to drag on at times, they do add some good depth to the myriad of characters throughout the game by showing their interactions with one another.
Without a doubt, LUNA The Shadow Dust is the most beautiful game I’ve played in a long time. A scintillating yet simple story told with no words, only the deepest emotions conveyed through glorious art and hypnotizing music, I was legitimately moved to tears multiple times. Of course, a few of those tears shed were in frustration over a puzzle or two, but in the end, it only extended my time with a phenomenal masterpiece crafted by video game artisans. A powerful, cautionary tale of those who forget that the brightest lights yield the longest shadows, LUNA The Shadow Dust is worth every single penny and will no doubt stay with players for years to come.
SEGA AGES Fantasy Zone isn’t anything fancy. But it doesn’t have to be. What we have here is a beloved SEGA classic with a few fun, new implementations thrown in, adding up to a retro experience that’s sure to add up to a fun at-home or on-the-go arcade experience with a decent amount of replayability. Whether you’ve visited Opa-Opa’s world before, or want to finally set foot into it for the first time, for $8, it’s pretty hard wrong with a game like this one.