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Hey Poor Player

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1788 games reviewed
74.2 average score
80 median score
62.0% of games recommended

Hey Poor Player's Reviews

4 / 5.0 - Teacup
Sep 28, 2021

Teacup was a lovely surprise in so many ways, its careful and quiet protagonist making a big impact in such a simple yet unexpected manner. With aesthetics that feel like a children’s storybook giving players a warm and cozy hug, Teacup is a fantastic little wholesome title that will delight anyone who feels drawn to it. If you’re looking for a bright, cheery game, Teacup is absolutely going to be your cup of chamomile.

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4 / 5.0 - Tails of Iron
Sep 27, 2021

Tails of Iron is not for the fainthearted. It’s a bloody, brutal, blistering experience from start to finish. Its combat smartly mixes skill and strategy. The game will push you to your limits, but it’s hard not to have fun skewering and slaughtering your way to redemption. While the game’s scope is, unfortunately, a bit limited, I have a feeling this won’t be the last time we hear from Redgi.

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Sep 27, 2021

When it comes down to it, Astria Ascending is a charming blend of new and old, and a very enjoyable RPG experience overall. I’m always happy when I see a game successfully emulate the spirit of the ever-sacred old-school RPG, and I can happily say that Artisan Studios really outdid themselves with this one!

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4 / 5.0 - UnMetal
Sep 27, 2021

Minor issues aside, UnMetal is an absolute winner. With gut-busting writing and a great mix of retro-inspired stealth action enhanced with modern mechanics, it’s a game that warrants a spot in any classic Metal Gear fan’s collection. Here’s hoping this isn’t the last time we get to take control of Jesse Fox. He may not be the action hero we deserve, but he’s the one we need right now.

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3 / 5.0 - In Sound Mind
Sep 27, 2021

In Sound Mind is a case of a great idea hobbled by flawed execution. It has some fascinating mechanics and an engaging story to tell. However, to experience the game’s best parts, you’ll have to suffer through a lot of moments of frustration. If you’re up for the challenge, this might just be a psychological horror title worth checking out. For anyone else, you might want to wait and see if developer We Create Stuff can iron out the kinks first.

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Sep 27, 2021

If you’re at all a fan of Metroidvanias and haven’t played most of these games, there’s no reason to wait. Not every game here is perfect, but they’re all at least good. Circle of the Moon provides the best mix between the old and new style of Castlevania, while Aria of Sorrow is an absolute triumph that holds up beautifully even after all these years. Harmony of Dissonance has more flaws but is still mostly an excellent play, and even Dracula X is a very solid title. I would have loved to see more work done to provide a total package here, but few collections have ever provided a better set of titles.

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Sep 27, 2021

The simple, pick-up-and-play racing action keeps things tame so anyone can pick one of the several rides and zoom down the masterfully crafted tracks without any fuss and little learning curve. With only a few misgivings to work on as of this review, Hot Wheels Unleashed has first place already in the bag, and I’m eager to see it continue succeeding down the line.

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4 / 5.0 - Residual
Sep 27, 2021

Still, even with a small handful of flaws, this is a solid game. Residual has awesome pixel art, a unique premise, addicting gameplay, and the promise of unique playthroughs every time you start a new game. While it’s not a perfect game, my complaints are fairly minor all things considered. I’d definitely recommend this game to anybody looking for a unique survival/platformer mashup.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Clash of Chefs VR
Sep 26, 2021

Clash of Chefs VR may appear simple and childish due to its bright and cheery aesthetics, but don’t judge a menu by its cover — this game will even challenge those with a food handler’s permit. Spending three years in Early Access did Clash of Chefs VR plenty of good, as all that time in the oven ensured a smooth and relatively bug-free experience. If you’re looking for a good VR simulator that you can keep coming back to for fun and frantic gameplay, Clash of Chefs VR will satisfy that craving.

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2.5 / 5.0 - Glyph
Sep 25, 2021

Honestly, a large part of me wonders if Glyph might have been better had it been a 2D platformer instead. As it stands now, it’s just too demanding and unbalanced for me to recommend to most gamers. But if you’re stubborn enough and willing to die repeatedly, you might find something to enjoy here. For everybody else, look for something a little less diabolical.

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Sep 25, 2021

If you want an insanely addicting core loop and don’t mind a little dust in the machinery, Gas Station Simulator will guzzle up an entire weekend before you know it.

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Hey Poor Player
Shane Boyle
Sep 25, 2021

Despite its accessible controls and decent space dogfighting action, the mobile roots of Subdivision Infinity DX don’t stand up to scrutiny as a console experience. The bare-bones story and repetitive gameplay loops simply don’t hold up when removed from the platform they were tailor-made for, which ultimately results in a game that is difficult to recommend.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Gamedec
Sep 23, 2021

Gamedec seems to show exactly how far you can pare down a cRPG, stripping away some of the deeper mechanics to streamline a tabletop-inspired experience. Those new to the genre will enjoy this opportunity to get their feet wet, while established veterans will feel this virtual “one-shot” campaign was executed succinctly. If you love cyberpunk detective stories and want something that will absolutely suck you in for 10 – 20 hours, you can’t go wrong with Gamedec.

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2.5 / 5.0 - Struggling
Sep 23, 2021

While Struggling eventually comes together to a degree and showcases impressive creativity, it doesn’t change that this is a game with audio that made me want to mute my TV and controls, which simply don’t feel good. It’s a real struggle to play. While that may be mostly intentional, it doesn’t make the game more enjoyable in the end. Some players may find more in it than me, but I’m more interested in seeing what the creative team at Chasing Rats Games does next. Any team with this much creativity feels like they have a great game in them. They didn’t get there this time, though.

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2.5 / 5.0 - Sheltered 2
Sep 23, 2021

Sheltered 2 is easily one of the most complicated games I’ve ever played. It’s fun if you liked the original Sheltered, or Fallout Shelter, and in many ways, it’s an upgrade of those apocalypse bunker sims. The issue, however, is that despite all of the game’s improvements and complexities, its overambition is also its biggest downfall. The core mechanics of its basic survival necessities of maintaining food and water are at the moment glitched, and any progress is meaningless because it will inevitably lead to a time-wasted end where resources inevitably run out two weeks in. As of right now, there are no ways of replenishing water save for bartering (if you’re lucky enough to find a faction with spare water), and so because of this, I can’t give this broken game a good review. With some updates to fix the bugs and polish off the post-apocalyptic dirt from this potential jewel, Sheltered 2 might be able to fulfil its lofty ambitions.

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3 / 5.0 - SkateBIRD
Sep 22, 2021

SkateBIRD is a fun, if flawed, experience. Charming, with a light-hearted story and a good sense of humor, there’s plenty to enjoy, even with the overly floaty feeling that hampers the controls. While it’s likely not the best skater you’ll ever play, it’s probably one of the more unique ones. I don’t think I’d really recommend it to hardcore fans of skater games, but for people looking for a casual experience you can pick up anytime and not feel too invested in, it might be worth a look.

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Sep 22, 2021

I’ve mentioned a lot of other games throughout this review. Uncharted, Jak & Daxter, Pikmin, I could name a few more too. While not a lot here is fully original, almost everything is well-executed, and when you add an excellent story and a ton of personality, you have a winning experience. Although there are a few minor issues here and there, Kena: Bridge of Spirits provides a wonderful base that we can only hope future games will build on.

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Hey Poor Player
Shane Boyle
Sep 22, 2021

With its kooky animal-battle royale concept, fast and addictive gameplay loop, and fair monetization systems, it’s difficult to not have fun with Super Animal Royale. Pixile Games has crafted a title that feels like a breath of fresh air in a genre that never seems to stop churning out new entries. Even if you’re like me, and sometimes shy away from battle royale games due to their inaccessibility, this is title definitely worth checking out. You never know, as with me, you may find yourself stumbling across a new obsession!

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3.5 / 5.0 - Metallic Child
Sep 21, 2021

It’s a fun and challenging game full of heart and creativity. The game is well worth the price of admission and has plenty to keep you coming back for more. If you’re a fan of rogue-likes and want something new to spend some time with, I’d check METALLIC CHILD out.

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4 / 5.0 - TOEM
Sep 21, 2021

I had a hard time putting TOEM down, its calming, cheerful nature feeling way too cozy to quit. Its photography-based puzzle gameplay will charm just about anyone that feels drawn to the title, so if you have even a remote interest in TOEM, it’s absolutely a safe bet. If you want 4 – 6 hours of wholesome fun that will leave you craving for more, take a little hike with TOEM.

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