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Hey Poor Player

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1623 games reviewed
73.9 average score
80 median score
59.9% of games recommended

Hey Poor Player's Reviews

I couldn’t have asked for much more from Trails to Azure. It fixes almost every issue I had with Trails From Zero and improves itself in nearly every way. The Legend of Heroes: Trails to Azure stands comfortably alongside some of the greatest RPGs I’ve ever played and is an early Game of the Year contender. Fans of the genre definitely shouldn’t miss it.

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Mar 7, 2023

Metroid Prime Remastered modernizes a classic, keeping everything good about it and fixing some of the few things that wouldn’t make sense to modern players. While a few late game design choices stop it from being near perfect, there are precious few better games you can play on a Nintendo Switch in 2023. New players should run to pick this one up, and those who haven’t touched it in twenty years won’t find a better way to revisit this classic.

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4 / 5.0 - Brave's Rage
Mar 6, 2023

I thoroughly enjoyed my time with Brave’s Rage. It was a refreshing take on the already crowded deckbuilder genre. With engaging, unique mechanics, plenty of unlockables to encourage repeated playthroughs, various challenges, and plenty of character combinations to explore, there’s a lot to draw in fans and newcomers to the genre alike. While it’s not the easiest or most accessible of deckbuilders out there, I definitely found it to be one of the most unique and enjoyable I’ve encountered in a while.

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Mar 6, 2023

I absolutely adored Cuddly Forest Friends. While clearly aimed at a much younger crowd, it’s so wholesome, so feel-good, that I think it’s got a very broad appeal, especially if you’re in the mood for something that’s just… cute, gentle, and sweet. With an adorable art style, cheerful music, and silly minigames, Cuddly Forest Friends is just a fun game all around. I honestly don’t think there’s an age limit on this game; give it a try if you just want something that makes you feel warm and fuzzy.

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Mar 6, 2023

Octopath Traveler II is a worthy successor to the first game, considering it improves upon many of the faults from the original whilst introducing refreshing new systems. The beautiful pixel art, engaging turn-based combat, gripping storytelling, and immaculate soundtrack make this game one of the must-plays of the year. The essence of nostalgia it manages to capture is simply unparalleled.

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Dead Cells: Return to Castlevania is another excellent expansion for the base game. It’s remarkable that nearly five years after its initial release, the development team continues to provide so much additional support, making one of my favorite games of 2018 even better. There’s a ton to like here for fans of both sides of this crossover, but you do have to appreciate both to get much out of it, as the difficulty of this new content will mean its best experienced after gaining some experience with the base game and upgrading your character.

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Mar 5, 2023

Fashion Police Squad is a boomer shooter with a fashion-infused twist, and that twist has resulted in one of the most innovative shooters on the market right now. Despite the latter stages of the campaign proving somewhat frustrating due to the sheer amount of split-second decisions that need to be made, Fashion Police Squad rises above any gripes I have by providing something genuinely new and, most importantly, incredibly fun.

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Mar 2, 2023

Wo Long: Fallen Dynasty is a damn near flawless game. The combat, while demanding, is the most rewarding combat system I’ve encountered, not just within Team Ninja’s portfolio, but within the Souls-like genre in general. By placing a focus on the timing of deflections and playing defense, without sacrificing any of their trademark speed and intensity, the developers over at Team Ninja have created a system that may just represent the peak of the genre. Along with the improved level design and a focus on exploration that rewards going off the beaten path, much like Elden Ring was for From Software, Wo Long: Fallen Dynasty feels like the near-perfect refinement of the formula they’ve iterated on over the years. If you can look past the admittedly frustrating focus on randomized gear and a slightly incoherent story, Wo Long: Fallen Dynasty is a masterpiece that deserves a place in the collection of any Souls-like fan.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Scars Above
Feb 28, 2023

Scars Above is a valiant attempt at providing a fresh spin on the souls-like genre. Its elemental-based third-person shooting feels genuinely fresh, with its reliance on environmental debuffs and stacking combos representing a genuine innovation within a space that isn’t exactly known for innovating, so it’s just a shame that the progression system feels so at odds with the efforts gone to by the developers in order to make Scars Above stand out. Despite that, the combat is still strong and is supplemented greatly by an atmosphere that, at times, feels truly out of this world. With that in mind, I definitely think souls-like fans and sci-fi fans alike should strap in and prepare for lift-off and join Kate on her journey into the unknown.

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3 / 5.0 - Wanted: Dead
Feb 27, 2023

I’ll say it like this: I’m actually mad about how much I want to like this game. While the simple but effective personalities can be so-bad-it’s-good occasionally and the soundtrack certainly survived the sound check, this gameplay isn’t doing it any favors. I can’t help but feel the story might have worked better as an anime as the interactive element is what lets Wanted: Dead down the most. With some more work, Wanted: Dead could be that hilariously fun love letter to retro anime and games of the early noughties that I desperately wanted it to be. As of right now, it’s just far too short, clunky and directionless to be worth the price of admission.

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3 / 5.0 - Helvetii
Feb 24, 2023

Despite gorgeous visuals, a strong soundtrack, and solid combat, Helvetii stumbles on basic game design. With this little variety within each area, the choice to make it a roguelite was a mistake and quickly left me wanting to move on to a different title. There’s certainly fun to be had here, but whether you’re looking for a great roguelite or action game, better options exist to meet your needs.

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Feb 23, 2023

Honestly, Theatrhythm Final Bar Line is pretty much a perfect game. It’s packed with content, has lots of fun stuff to unlock, features different ways to play, and encourages players to take a chance on higher difficulties. While I do think that Ultimate and Supreme almost go out of their way to be overly punishing, that doesn’t change how much I still enjoy this game. Even if you’ve never played one Final Fantasy game, you owe it to yourself to see what all the fuss is about in Theatrhythm Final Bar Line.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Pharaoh: A New Era
Feb 22, 2023

Pharaoh is one of those dream remaster candidates for those who fondly remember ’80s and ’90s PC games, so it stands to reason that fans of the original would have high hopes for Pharaoh: A New Era. Although it doesn’t quite meet those expectations for a few reasons — both understandable and questionable — Pharaoh: A New Era is still a must-play for anyone who loves city-builders, Ancient Egypt, or just wants to try something nuanced and interesting. If you’re looking to unearth ancient gaming treasures to polish into something new, Pharaoh: A New Era is proof the gaming gods answer prayers in mysterious ways.

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Feb 22, 2023

Despite some small nitpicks, I still very much recommend Grim Guardians: Demon Purge. It not only showcases Inti Creates’ skill at breathing new life into old series, but it does so with panache. The combat is varied and complex, and the challenge, though sometimes frustrating, nevertheless kept me invested during the entirety of my playthrough. Not to mention you’ll unlock a new mode and difficulty after beating the game once. Plus, if you have a friend close by, you can both play a sister in local co-op. If you enjoy platformers and are hankering for a new Castlevania-inspired adventure, look no further.

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4 / 5.0 - Onion Assault
Feb 21, 2023

I struggle to find much to complain about here. The gameplay and production are solid. If anything, I wish there were more of…everything. It took me about three hours to 100% beat the game. There are three coins to find in each level, but there doesn’t seem to be a reward for getting them. The first half of the game can be a bit predictable, but the latter half is more creatively diverse, which makes me wonder what another world or two of content would have been like. Even if you don’t like onions, Onion Assault is a well-crafted and polished little game that’s worthy of your time.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Elderand
Feb 19, 2023

Ultimately, I came away from Elderand feeling mostly satisfied. It didn’t produce anything particularly unique or exceptional, but I’m not exactly sure that it was ever attempting to do that. What it did provide was an enjoyable adventure combined with impressive art and a splendid music score – seriously, I want the OST to this game and snappy controls with which to while away the hours of an evening or three exploring these lands beyond. I may not have been particularly invested in the printed goal of the quest. Still, I certainly enjoyed my time expanding the map, grapple swinging, and trouncing any would-be adversaries that stood in my way of reaching said printed goal. But, in an industry riddled with a plethora of similar experiences ranging from middling to exemplary, a game that manages to simply be solid, fun, and respectful of my time is certainly enough for me.

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Despite my gripes with the difficulty in the early stages of the career mode, Pixel Cup Soccer: Ultimate Edition is an amazing attempt at capturing the simplistic and joyful appeal of retro soccer games. With its simple gameplay and deceptively deep career mode, it’s a title that is incredibly easy to pick up, all while being equally difficult to put down. If you feel overwhelmed by the complex beasts that modern-day sports games have become and long for a return to simpler times, Pixel Cup Soccer: Ultimate Edition is absolutely championship-winning material.

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Feb 17, 2023

While not the best game in the series, Like a Dragon: Ishin! offers great fun to long-time fans while also delivering an excellent opportunity for those interested in these games to jump in and see what all the fuss is about. While it’s a different take on the classic formula, there’s enough here that still feels like a Like A Dragon game to provide an idea of whether this series is for you.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Ten Dates
Feb 17, 2023

Ten Dates features strong writing sold by actors that genuinely embodied their parts. There were quite a few surprises in the non-linear path to love — some that made me think twice about a candidate before veering off to another — which was embraced by the gameplay and encouraged multiple playthroughs. Although the weighting of the questions wasn’t entirely clear, that didn’t stop me from having a lovely time. If you’re tired of looking for love in all the wrong places, Ten Dates has plenty of singles ready to mingle.

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4 / 5.0 - Wild Hearts
Feb 16, 2023

The team at Omega Force have done a commendable job with Wild Hearts, as it does just enough to stand out from the Monster Hunter games that Capcom has created. This ambitious project boasts a beautiful high fantasy feudal Japan setting and an intuitive and game-changing Karakuri building mechanic. However, the high cost of entry and performance issues hold it back from being truly captivating.

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