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Hey Poor Player

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1786 games reviewed
74.2 average score
80 median score
61.9% of games recommended

Hey Poor Player's Reviews

3 / 5.0 - Bullet Soul
Apr 18, 2017

If you like taking a one way trip to Bullet Hell, you will have fun. Everyone else, you’re better off looking elsewhere.

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Apr 18, 2017

. If you’re a fan of the original or just looking for a charming, retro-inspired adventure, Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap is a game you’ll want to experience at least once.

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Apr 18, 2017

If you’re a die-hard fan of platformers, eager to play everything the genre has to offer, than you might find that the jazzy music and whimsical charm of Voodoo Vince Remastered is just what the (witch) doctor ordered. But for everyone else, you really should just play Yooka-Laylee.

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Apr 15, 2017

"Does this new port job make or break the experience for console players? Well, nothing's broken, but there are some rusty wheels on this cart, and the carpentry job could have been better."

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Apr 6, 2017

If Bulletstorm flew under your radar before, don’t let it happen again.

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Apr 5, 2017

Danganronpa 1-2 Reload unloads two full clips of murder mystery mayhem into the PS4 that no fan of the genre will want to miss.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Yooka Laylee
Apr 4, 2017

No, it may not do anything particularly new or innovative, but it doesn’t really need to – it’s still one of the most solid, charming, and just plain fun platformers in years. It has its flaws, yes, like any other game, but those flaws are offset by a brilliantly-designed open world and the ridiculous amount of content on offer. It’s a welcome reminder of a bygone era that feels familiar even as it offers vast improvements on its storied predecessors.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Blackwood Crossing
Apr 4, 2017

The game is only a two hour investment providing the puzzles give you no issues, and with an asking price of only $15 it is well worth every moment, even if half of the time you’re left sobbing into your keyboard.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Thimbleweed Park
Mar 30, 2017

From the perfect cast of characters to the superb writing and puzzle designs, Thimbleweed Park is a must-play title that no fan of the point-and-click genre should miss out on, and hopefully the latest of many more adventures in store from Ron Gilbert and Gary Winnick.

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Mar 28, 2017

When all is said and done, FATED‘s thoughtful and poignant narrative often shows flashes of promise, but the game’s sudden and unsatisfying climax to an almost criminally short adventure just left me wanting more.

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Mar 28, 2017

It’s a drop-dead gorgeous storybook of a tale, honors the mechanics and worldbuilding on whic it tills its soil, and at its best deserves to be checked out by any fan of classic 2D Zelda games.

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1 / 5.0 - Troll and I
Mar 27, 2017

There’s plenty I wanted to like about Troll and I. But in the end, I can’t think of any part of my time with the game that I really enjoyed.

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3 / 5.0 - Rain World
Mar 27, 2017

I wanted to love Rain World, I really did, but in the end I couldn’t. Although it starts out strong, and boasts a variety of unique gameplay features, it ends up coming out a bit muddled due to the abusive limits it places on players and overbearing confusion.

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A lot of games fail because of a lack of ambition. Herald is that rare and tragic beast that actually fails because it’s too ambitious.

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4 / 5.0 - Toukiden 2
Mar 21, 2017

Even if you’re new to the series, as I am, you can pick this title up with virtually no barrier to entry and enjoy it fully.

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2 / 5.0 - Antagonist
Mar 19, 2017

Antagonist is a mess of a human who just really, really wants you to laugh at its jokes and care about the story it wants to tell. It has nothing else left. Its wife left, took the kids and the dog, and kicked it out of the house. Now it sleeps on couches and remembers when it made her laugh on their first dates, when things were easy. Easy like every writing choice this game makes.

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3.5 / 5.0 - The Crow's Eye
Mar 17, 2017

If you’re a fan of first-person puzzle games and have been disappointed by the lack of true genre gems in recent years, then The Crow’s Eye is for you.

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Psychonauts in the Rhombus of Ruin is by no means a bad game. However, the long bouts of downtime and lack of compelling puzzles can make for a dull and sometimes disappointing ride.

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Mar 14, 2017

I’m sad to say that I can’t in good conscience recommend Touhou Genso Wanderer for anyone outside of the anime fandom, unless if they’re a genuine Touhou fan.

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Mar 14, 2017

eaturing a short, bland adventure, a nearly-nonexistent plot, and diverse characters that are ultimately bogged down by the in-game Stamina mechanic, Touhou Double Focus probably won’t satisfy anyone who isn’t a diehard Touhou fan.

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