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Hey Poor Player

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1788 games reviewed
74.2 average score
80 median score
62.0% of games recommended

Hey Poor Player's Reviews

Sep 1, 2021

A compelling tale about a psychological breakdown and loss brought to life with a vibrant comic book art style, there’s a lot to like about this debut. For a first release, it’s a pretty fantastic job, despite a few minor hiccups.

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Aug 31, 2021

Nothing to Remember had a solid vision and the bones of something great, but nothing really came together to make a memorable experience. The immersion factor wasn’t there, the story moves along entirely too slowly, and there’s little focus in anything that would have helped keep players invested. Nothing to Remember genuinely looks good, but its well-designed façade hides an unnecessarily convoluted method of storytelling devoid of any handholds that would allow players to get a good grasp on anything. What a shame, considering this genre is still relatively unexplored, that an otherwise promising entry is such a forgettable letdown.

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5 / 5.0 - Song of Iron
Aug 30, 2021

With an unbelievable look, tight gameplay, and bravura moments which shouldn’t work yet do, Song of Iron breaks away from the pack and stands alone. It is a stunning achievement and an absolute must-play. Hear the song and join the fight.

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3 / 5.0 - Clid the Snail
Aug 30, 2021

At the end of the day, Clid the Snail is a fun but flawed first effort for Weird Beluga. I enjoyed the game’s more deliberate approach to its gunplay, and the weapon variety and shell customization options kept the action feeling fresh. Add to that some excellent puzzles and fantastic worldbuilding, and there’s no denying that there’s a lot to love here. That’s why it’s such a shame that things become so frustrating due to the developer’s artistic choices. After all, it’s hard to focus on a firefight when it looks like half of the screen has been slathered in vaseline. Perhaps the developer will add a patch down the road to remedy the muddy visuals. And if they do, Clid the Snail will be a much more playable experience. As for me, I’d probably wait and see if they clean things up before taking the plunge. However, if those issues aren’t enough to dissuade you, escargot ahead and give Clid a shot.

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3.5 / 5.0 - Patron
Aug 30, 2021

Despite any aforementioned hiccups, Patron is an addicting medieval city-builder that can hold its head up high amongst the others in this well-established genre.

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4 / 5.0 - Townscaper
Aug 30, 2021

Townscaper is minimalist in every sense of the word — minimalist gameplay, minimalist UI, minimalist sound — but the sheer amount of potential hidden within this title defies its style. If you’re looking for a new obsession or a nice little title to play during lunch breaks or just before bed, Townscaper is the soothing sandbox town-builder that will do the trick. The town-building aspect may be instantaneous, but you’ll soon learn you spend an awful lot of time discovering all the little signs of life that spring up along the way.

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Aug 29, 2021

Murder Mystery Machine utilizes a fun detective mechanic that makes you really feel like you’re connecting the dots, but there are a few technical issues that brought down the experience ever so slightly. With that being said, it’s one of the few detective games that actually feels like you’re piecing the puzzle together instead of being lead to the correct answer, so be sure to get your brain ready for some extreme teasing. If you love murder mysteries and want a fascinating story with a lot more going on underneath than initially meets the eye, booting up Murder Mystery Machine is a no-brainer.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Tormented Souls
Aug 27, 2021

If you love classic survival horror titles, Tormented Souls needs to be on your radar. It’s a terrifically terrifying love letter to Resident Evil, Silent Hill, and Alone in the Dark. With brilliant puzzles, a genuinely scary setting to explore, and unsettling monsters to face, it’s the kind of game that will shock you to your core and stick with you long after the credits roll. While it undoubtedly wears its old-school inspiration on its bloodied sleeve, make no mistake: Tormented Souls is a modern survival horror masterpiece.

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Aug 27, 2021

No More Heroes 3 dazzlingly outshines its predecessors in many respects. The combat is vastly superior, the overworld map makes a triumphant return, and the art styles and music are so brilliantly executed to the point where I want to buy the entire dev team a round of drinks. In the team’s eagerness to return to a clearly beloved franchise, I think a lot of fantastic storyline ideas came together in a way that didn’t always fit perfectly, but No More Heroes 3 was never anything less than a total blast. If you’ve already played the other three games in the series and loved every second, I have no idea why you’re still reading this article — go get No More Heroes 3 already!

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2 / 5.0 - Confessions
Aug 27, 2021

I hate dunking on a game made by solo and small teams, but Confessions is blah at best and extremely irresponsible at worst. I’m not saying it shouldn’t exist, but mental health professionals should have been consulted to add things like list of resources for grief, depression, or suicidal thoughts. People are confessing to committing crimes on here FFS (assuming they’re being truthful, of course). If you have an interest, you’re welcome to check it out on Steam for $2.99 or itch.io for free, but do so at your own discretion. Post Secret remains the superior analog version anyway.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Toodee and Topdee
Aug 27, 2021

Honestly, there’s not much of anything I can say negatively about Toodee and Topdee. If you’re looking for something new to play, or if you just want to support an up-and-coming indie team, you owe it to yourself to check this out.

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4 / 5.0 - OBAKEIDORO!
Aug 26, 2021

OBAKEIDORO! is a fantastic, family-friendly version of Dead by Daylight that just about anyone will find addicting. At first, I thought I’d only want to play it for a round or two, but I found myself unable to put down my Switch until several hours later. OBAKEIDORO!’s charm is in its deceptive simplicity — there are so many little balancing acts happening at once that melt together into pure casual, spooky fun. Bet you can’t play just one round of OBAKEIDORO!; once you’ve entered this creepy cute world, you’re here forever!

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3.5 / 5.0 - Dragon Star Varnir
Aug 24, 2021

Dragon Star Varnir is a fun JRPG overall, and, while it might be a little on the niche side, I’d still recommend it. Unfortunately, I’m not sure which version to recommend. Sure, the Switch version comes with a bunch of DLC and is entirely uncensored (did I forget to mention that?), but the graphics are, like, really crunchy—and I say that as someone who normally doesn’t care much about graphical quality. If that isn’t enough to drive you away, though, then the Switch version’s probably the way to go. The more content, the better, right?

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4 / 5.0 - Mini Motorways
Aug 24, 2021

Considering it’s a game all about cars and congestion, you’d think Mini Motorways would be a tense and stressful endeavor, but it’s by far one of the most addictingly chill game I’ve played in recent memory. I’m pretty sure it lowered my blood pressure, setting a nice calm mood right before bed. Players expecting a sandbox city planning game will be momentarily disappointed, but after only a few minutes with it, that disappointment will melt away (along with the day’s worries and woes). If you need to relax, like, right now, you must check out Mini Motorways.

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Aug 24, 2021

Arashi: Castles of Sin had so much potential. With satisfying sneaking and a wide selection of interesting tools to use, it’s easy to recommend to fans of the genre or anyone who likes the idea of a VR version of Tenchu. It’s just a shame that the barebones swordplay makes what should have been the game’s most exciting moments feel like a repetitive slog. As it stands, it’s still a solid game. But with a bit more polish and refinement, it could have been so much more. If you can overlook the tacked-on swordplay, you’ll find Arashi: Castles of Sin gives you a lot of gameplay for your $30. The stages are massive, so you can count on spending 8-10 hours making your way through the game’s campaign. So set your expectations accordingly, and you might just find this to be a welcome addition to your PSVR library.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Psychonauts 2
Aug 23, 2021

After more than fifteen years, Raz’s return is everything fans could have hoped for. It tells a wonderful story about how we have to learn from our mistakes and continue to grow while keeping the humor we expect from any Double Fine production. Now and then, the control scheme can be a minor pain, but most of the time, it plays like a dream with a level of polish few games launch with anymore. Psychonauts 2 is one of the best games of 2021. Hopefully, we won’t have to wait another sixteen years to team back up with the Psychonauts.

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4 / 5.0 - Alien Scumbags
Aug 22, 2021

If you’re in the mood for a few good laughs and some great gore, Alien Scumbags has everything you’re looking for. While simplistic and occasionally exhausting, the combat still provides a fine challenge and plenty of rewards for exploring during your alien slaughter. Add to that the staggering amount of references found throughout the campaign, and it’s clear this was a project born of passion and dedication. As long as you don’t go in expecting a revolutionary gameplay experience, you’ll find little not to love about Alien Scumbags.

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2.5 / 5.0 - Recompile
Aug 21, 2021

I love the way Recompile looks, and a Metroidvania with this much freedom could definitely work. To do so however, it would need to clean the world design up enough that you can tell where you’re going. A tighter jump or more forgiving platforms would go a long way as well. As is, far too much progress in Recompile feels like it comes down to luck and repetition rather than skill. Game Pass subscribers who love the look may want to give this one a chance, but most players will quickly want to eject from this drive.

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4 / 5.0 - Road 96
Aug 20, 2021

Road 96 started off a bit rocky for me but quickly became one of the best games I’ve played all year. It’s absolutely on my top 10 games list for 2021, and, given enough time with it, I’m sure it’ll be yours as well. The Switch is a fine home for this politically-charged narrative, and if you have a desire to overthrow corrupt systems or just cross the border for a better life, chances are you’ll feel the same way too. If you want to get lost in a dystopian world, then do everything in your power to leave it, hitchhike your way to Road 96.

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4.5 / 5.0 - Arietta of Spirits
Aug 20, 2021

Arietta of Spirits is one seriously charming journey. It exudes the kind of warmth and casual sense of adventure that you can only seem to find in these indie gems. From its stellar spritework to the way the music and ambient sounds wind their way gently through the deep forests, everything comes together to deliver a game that’s easy on the eyes and memorable. And while this spirit’s tale is quite a bit shorter than most, the scene set around it radiates a vibrance that truly lets this fairytale soar. If you have a few hours to spare and got the funds, you’d be remiss not to give this ghost story a fair venture.

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