The Crush House Reviews
A fun and frenetic reality TV sim, The Crush House delivers thoughtful commentary on virtual voyeurism.
While the more randomized elements of The Crush House can make it frustrating at times, this "thirst-person shooter" still delivers quite the unique and fun experience. After all, how many games can claim that they provide a challenge in seeing if players can find a way to capture three butts on camera at once while also getting a glimpse of the Success Slide in order to please both the Conspiracy Theorists and Mega Fans? Throw in a good spoof of reality shows with a memorable cast and some bright '90s Malibu visuals, and you have something worth toasting over with a nice glass of Crush Juice...
A clever and triumphantly unfun immersive sim that challenges you to find the humanity in a timeless parody of 90s reality TV.
The Crush House gives you your very own reality TV show to produce and film, full of drama, naughtiness and a whole lot of butts.
The Crush House feels like a victim of its own confidence. It’s so self-sure of its premise and big-brained twist that it fails to dig a little deeper under the surface to actually justify any of it. The gameplay itself is incredibly shallow and dull when it isn’t being a frustrating exercise in dice-rolling. The characters are basically all the same person and interact with each other the same ways, repeating the same small set of possible events over and over. Your involvement in the whole equation is to sit there and watch, and hope the emojis and numbers on the screen are doing the good thing instead of irritating you. The payoff is just as shallow as the gameplay, making the whole subversive twist as commentary gimmick a bust.
As is the case with an actual reality show, I’m left grappling with conflicting feelings when I roll credits on The Crush House. It’s a sharp social satire wrapped up in one of the funniest puzzle games I’ve ever played, but the mechanical simulation leaves me wanting more. As I sit down to map out my criticisms, that’s when it hits me: I’m an emoji in my own audience segment. Maybe The Crush House would playfully nickname me a “snob,” one who keeps saying the term “high-concept” in the chat at random intervals. Maybe the things I’d want to see would clash with an audience hungry for this sleeker design that’s still perfectly functional and creative. The Crush House serves as a reminder that you can’t please everybody, or else you’ll end up in the backyard filming lawn gnomes.
The game also showcases a great sense of humor on every level, from eccentric gameplay and entertainingly-nonsensical arguments to small details like its ads, which are designed by fellow developers and feature Easter eggs for other games like Cult of the Lamb. Especially considering the game's $16.99 price, it's easy to overlook some of its flaws, like repetition or a few buggy conversations where characters spoke too far apart, when it's so genuinely clever on every level. Crush House doesn't require a preexisting love of reality TV to enjoy - only an appreciation for true ingenuity.
I can’t wait to be able to talk about this one in detail, it surprised me how much I liked it. Even if it kind of feels like a roguelite, I don’t care; being able to mastermind this show by picking the cast and placing things around to evoke emotions was fun, every. single. time. If you like dynamic games where you, the player will kind of set up the dominos and watch them fall I feel like you will be hard pressed to find a better game than The Crush House. Not only was it fun setting up the various shots and seeing things unfold amongst the various castmates but the mystery here is the real draw. Go into this one as blind as you can, you will thank me for it.
Finally, Crush House should also be commended for its representation, full of varied and complex characters that slowly reveal themselves through conversations, or even acts as simple as changing into a swimsuit. It’s incredibly refreshing to see characters living their authentic selves without fear, or without apology… though, again, it’s insane how many have expert knowledge into the science behind ripples in pool water.
The Crush House exceeded all my expectations, creating an experience that was enjoyable, engaging and incredibly reflective.
The Crush House is a clever and entertaining spin on reality television - one that has its tongue firmly in cheek, but which also speaks to deeper themes in the metanarrative I'm working hard not to spoil here. It's repetitive and a little unfair at times, but also compelling and enjoyable - and there's a real thrill to getting good footage.
The Crush House might not be the perfect production players were hoping for but what's there is a really good time and at least always fun. The nature of working and grinding to line up the perfect shot to watch the numbers tick up as you satisfy weird audiences from all walks of life is novel and never gets old. Yes, this means you're not always authentically re-creating the filming of reality TV as you instead focus on props and the environment in the interest of points, hurting the spotlight on its cast. Though when you can focus on its characters they're all irreverent, queer and delightfully heinous. I found myself always ready to drop everything for them at the drop of a hat as I tended to their ridiculous tasks, slowly working to an enticing sinister narrative that was hiding underneath. If all else, I could never accuse The Crush House's beauty of being skin-deep. It is weird, extra, juicy and unapologetic as all hell. It's exactly what it should be.
The Crush House is a game that clearly manifested from a fantastic core idea, but falls short of realising its vast potential due to curious performance issues and a gameplay loop that just barely misses its opportunity to fully bloom.
The Crush House has its share of solid moments, but it ends up oscillating between creativity and boredom. The day to day filming schedule needed to be spruced up to avoid repetitive dialogue and bland footage.
The Crush House, meanwhile, is bright and fruity, and the sinister element that is meant to carry the subversion seems to be something more akin to something like “tee hee, we know this is a bit problematic, but we sure love reality TV anyway.” It makes sense that this is where the developers would land. We all know that reality TV should be critiqued even as we all have at least one example of it that we can’t help but watch. The developers have also made a genuinely entertaining game out of it. It would be ridiculous to criticise candy for being good at being candy. I think I’m just surprised that it didn’t have more substance because it seemed like it had all the potential in the world to be a grand dessert.
The Crush House may have an imaginative concept, but the game fails to portray its characters well or deliver a satisfying conclusion to the story.
Review in Slovak | Read full review
Mystery, drama, flirting, and a lot of backstage stress. “The Crush House” embraces the idea of “15 minutes of fame” and how easy it for it to crumble. A very interesting — perhaps almost unique look into one of the most dominant TV genre in the past 20 years.
Review in Portuguese | Read full review
The Crush House is interesting at first, with a really novel concept and controls that are really easy to pick up, but its innovative aspect and replayability don’t last for long. Between its repetitive nature and predictable plot twists, you’ll only get a true kick out of it if you’re really into celebrity culture, trash television reality shows, and don’t mind some unsubtle jabs at consumerism, “bread and circus” mentality, and so on. Even if it didn’t wow me that much, I can’t call it a bad game. Also, if anything, it’s a stupidly creative title. It just needed a bit more substance.
Nerial leaves cards and cheating aside to bring us The Crush House, a very original reality show simulator that reminds us that keeping everyone happy is impossible. The most interesting part is in the story, which is revealed little by little and, although it is predictable, it has two endings, which gives the title a certain replayability. In short, an ideal videogame to bring out the Kubrick that hides inside each of us.
Review in Spanish | Read full review
While it doesn't fully capture the reality TV experience, I really enjoyed the ideas presented by The Crush House and would love to see a sequel down the line which builds upon them.